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怎样道歉才是正确的做法?(抚顺英语培训)

Chances are, you've had to apologize plenty of times in your life. And there's a good chance you've alsouttered the phrase, "I never meant to hurt you."

英语学习

生活中你可能要道歉很多次,而且很有可能说过这句话:“我从没想过要伤害你”。

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Stop doing that, says author Caroline Myss.

作者卡罗兰·梅斯说:“别再说那句话了。”

In a talk Myss ― a spiritual seeker, researcher ― took on the topic of forgiveness and healing, and explained in no uncertain terms why "

梅斯是一位精神导师和研究员,她在一次访谈中讲了原谅和疗伤的话题,并且非常明确地解释了为什么“

"Picture that person coming up to you and saying, 'Wow, bummer. I'm sorry I did this, but, you know, I never meant to hurt you. And, hey, can we just call it a day?'" Myss says.

梅斯说:“想象一下,那个人朝你走过来跟你说‘哦,哥们,很抱歉我那样做,但你知道的,我从没想过要伤害你。就这样吧好吗?’”

As tempting as it can be to move on and bury the hatchet, that type of apology won’t sit well with the person on the receiving end. "That whole little thing ― 'I never meant to hurt you' ―

虽然让关系能发展下去并停战和解是很吸引人的,但那种道歉真的不适合说给对方,她说:“那句‘我从没想过要伤害你’所对应的整件小事,

Instead, Myss says it's important to approach the conversation differently. "Let's redo the scene," Myss says. "[The person] comes up to you and says... 'I need to tell you something. I consciously knew what I was doing. I consciously knew it, and I have to call it something else:

梅斯说相反很重要的是要以别的方式引入话题,。梅斯说:“咱们重新设想一下刚才的场景,那个人走向你说‘我要跟你说件事,我深知自己做了什么,我意识到了,我觉着应该换个说法:

I sinned against you. It was a sin. I heard my conscience tell me not to do this and I didn't listen. It didn't matter to me. And I know that my actions redirected the course of your life. It was conscious. It was a sin, because it was conscious. And how much it hurt you did not stop me. This is not a boo-boo.'"

我得罪你了。是我的错,我的良心告诉我不要那样做,但我没当回事,这对我没什么影响,但我知道我的行为改变了你的生活,我是有意的。是我的错,因为我是故意的,对你的伤害也没能阻止我,’”

Even saying those words on stages makes Myss visibly emotional, and she points out that this is how deeply within the soul apologies are supposed to resonate.

梅斯甚至在舞台上说这番话时都很激动,她指出就是这种心灵的道歉才能引起深刻的共鸣。

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